About me

My name is Chang Xian. I believe I have been looking for happiness and peace since I can remember. I thought money would have solved it, so I looked for a job that paid well, I found a Korea Sweater company looking for people and they paid well, in there I conquered the most challenging job and got the highest pay, only that didn’t make me happy but miserable, feeling meaningless; I thought it might be a better position, it only made me feeling vain and empty inside?

I thought it might be location, marriage, or to be a mother? All these happened for me. I married to a British caring guy and immigrated to the Uk in 2006, I am also living in Chellaston, Derby not far from my favourite novel character’s home: Pride and Prejudice, Mr Dance’s mansion, Chatsworth House. We had a beautiful baby girl.

for 2-3 years I was happy then I felt wrong again, inside me that pit feeling came back. I had the thought of suicide, a few times I found myself was thinking who to give my child to, a relative or to a friend to bring her up. Only I couldn’t find anyone that I could trust enough who would give the love my child deserves, a place she could grow up feeling special, not less than any anyone else in her life. I cried even more. I didn’t want to talk to anyone and I couldn’t hear people. I was tearing apart, wanting my child grow up happy and I don’t want to live any longer.

By the way, please know this all my families, friends were and still love me very much, my husband loves me, my child’s perfect, and I live in a comfortable home. Beautiful weather, fresh clean air, birds singing…They seemed had nothing to do with me. It was too painful to see my child grew up no one loved her and understood her properly, I gave up the idea of suicide, I started to think to live better for my daughter. I thought I needed a degree if I wanted to find a better job in the UK.

I did get in University of Derby by luck. My English wasn’t good enough though. I kept stuck on words and lectures, especially when it was the last year of my final assignment time, I was so stressed, three months had past, three weeks left to submit my report and essay, and I didn’t have anything to write about, no good notes, not read enough for my reference, I had nothing, I was in a panic state. I don’t mean the rest time during the 4-year my university was smooth, though the staffs were superbly helpful, but I didn’t ask for help. This time I felt so overwhelming, 4 years’ study, I am going to fail at the end. I wanted to scream, I did inwardly. I felt inside me was tore apart once again, I just wanted to end my life right there right then.

I closed my eyes, suddenly everything went silence. I saw my great uncle carried a lit up candle walking toward me, I think I was in a dark place, a tunnel maybe, anyway I couldn’t see. He was as always serene, peaceful. He handed me the candle and he disappeared into the thin air. Using the candle I could see. My great uncle had saved my life again as he did when I was 7 years old. My great uncle was a grand master in Meditation, Qigong and Taichi.

After I woke up from met my great uncle in my head, the 3 weeks seemed prolonged for 3 years, it gave me the feeling that it was dead easy to finish my work on time. Ever since I started to study Qigong as my great uncle had suggested me to do so, why Qigong carries so much power to alter things in my mind in my life. When I wanted to help people during the pandemic, I realised a lot of the people were crying for help, help from something like Qigong, Meditation and TaiChi. Here I am now, gained a teaching Qigong certificate and a healer from Spring Forest Qigong.

Now, I teach and practise in the following:

• Meditation
• Qi Gong
• Tai Chi

I think myself as a spiritual teacher than anything, why we aren’t happy and what can we do about it. Once we understand ourselves better, we can live ‘a happier, healthier and smoother life on the earth. Qigong is a Chinese cultural belief that the gentle exercise could uplift human spirit. Tai Chi is known in the UK to do something similar. With the help of Qigong and Taichi and Meditation, one’s life can be purified and lifted and healed, providing people the opportunity to live a healthier, happier and smoother life.

My Relationship with Qigong

When I was 7, I fell ill. I couldn’t eat. The smell churned my stomach. Living in China, going to the doctors wasn’t free, and it wasn’t cheap. It’s not like the NHS of the United Kingdom. My parents used their savings taking me to the doctors, because they didn’t know what was wrong with me. But neither did the doctors. 

My Aunt Qiao had heard that I wasn’t well and suggested that I see my Great Uncle, Fo Shan, to see if he could help me in a way the doctors couldn’t.

Meeting my Great Uncle – a Qigong Master

Fo Shan looked like a wizard, with his white beard and gown. The stereotypical idea of a mage in modern 1980s China; it is perhaps from China that the western world developed this image after all. As a 7-year-old, this was a magical experience. Fo Shan, with wise, soft old eyes, looked down at me and promised to make me better.

He said: “I’m going to take the illness inside you and put it in this bottle. Close your eyes. Can you show me where it is not comfortable by feeling it deeply, so I can see it? Feel it as deeply as possible so I can get it all out.”

I remember his voice was comforting, smooth and calm. I felt safe with him. 

It was a silent place, vast sky, I could see miles. We sat there, on a mountain top. Fo Shan taught me to sit and breathe in a certain way, he taught me how to move my body in a slow motioned in a certain way…strange as it was–for weeks I hadn’t been off bed, but in the morning, I jumped off the bed and played like nothing had happened. 

He told me with this strategy I would always safe, if I was wise, I would practise it daily, but if I wasn’t doing it, but still remember: Qigong exists!

The more I practise, the more I study this gentle yet profound Chinese ancient art, the more amazed I am, I am convinced Qigong is the key for human happiness. I love to help more people to know and to practise it.

Positive Thinking and Mindfulness

What my great uncle taught me, alongside qigong, is a tool known in the 21st century as positive thinking and mindfulness. Psychologists tell their patients to practise thinking positively, and to challenge negative thinking in order to tackle mental health issues; to release emotions and thoughts that may be part of the person’s blueprint but are no longer needed. To store the negativity in a box and put it away somewhere safe.

My great uncle gave me the bottles and told me to do the same.

Positive thinking is one step of many in Qigong, and this was my first step into a journey of Qigong. Every day, for 5 minutes, my great uncle would encourage me to practice Qigong, to focus on gentle movement and breathing. I’d imitate a tree, move like a deer, tiger and snake… the more I practised, the healthier I became in both body and mind. Each day, I noticed that my body didn’t feel as heavy as before.

Almost 40 years later, I still practise Qigong. And as the world becomes busier and times become troubled, I see people becoming out of sync with their body and Mind. That’s why I took Spring Forest Qigong’s courses, so that I would be able to efficiently teach people Qigong just like my great uncle had done for me.

I would be honoured to be your guide for part of your personal journey towards a more mindful, more connected and, ultimately, better life.

Degrees

Bachelor of Arts in Creative and Professional Writing

Post Graduate Certificate in Psychology

Certificate in Qigong